Sunday, June 17, 2012

Wet and Wild

Many years ago, when my Aunt Holly stopped by to help bathe me for my first horse show, Brita said:
There are three things you need to know about this horse and baths.
#1           He Bites
#2           He Kicks
#3           He will try to get away.


REALLY?

Yes, Really!


You see.
I . Hate . Baths
I protest.  I wiggle.  I try to get away.  So today, after at least a week of putting me away damp and dingy, Brita decided I needed a good thorough bath.  All was going pretty well, until she began scrubbing my rump with the jelly scrubber…..
Plop.  The lead rope landed at my feet.  **SNORT**
Carefully, I stepped back a step. 
The lead rope moved with me. 
You know what that means Sports Fans.  There is no human attached to it.
I spun to my left.  WhoopEEEE.  No bath for meEEEE.


I trotted up the driveway, hung a hard left and accelerated up the road Wild and Free!  Within the first fifty feet I was at a strong gallop, my mane and tail whipping in the wind.
When I reached the horizon, an uncomfortable feeling hit.  I was all alone.  And that is not a good thing.
What if some dangerous traffic comes along?  What if its farm machinery?  What if I have to make a life or death decision?  All on my own?
I did the only thing a sensible horse would do in that situation.  I turned around, and ran home.
Brita met me at the edge of the lawn with my lunch in a bucket (how thoughtful).  Mom was standing by in the car, ready to give chase.  Which was unlucky for me, because now I was out numbered two to one.  


Soon I was subdued and bathed.  Scrubbed within an inch of my life.  I would have been better off facing the farm machinery.

3 comments:

tricia said...

Awww, poor WPG. The things people do to noble creatures like yourself... I am glad you made it home safely (and very sensibly, I might add!) but I'm sorry you did have to endure such a horrible scrubbing. If Sherman could post a message to you here, he'd say more power to you, brother, only next time, don't come back!

Bif said...

I mean, they're not the greatest, but a bath isn't that awful. I would NEVER go to the fast road just to avoid a bath...

Boyfriend

Carly said...

ah! i love this. I'm def going to be keeping an eye on this blog. My big grey boy sat down during a bath once. I guess the water on his butt was a little to cold...